How the Mighty can Fall
by Joshabi
Summary: Forced into a situation which he has no control over, a human desperately attempts to return home after being tricked into Equestria by a great power. But can he get back, or is he being lead into a destiny that he is desperate to avoid?
1. We Are All Equals in Death

How the Mighty Can Fall Chapter 1  
>Forced into a situation which he has no control over, a human desperately attempts to return home after being tricked into Equestria by a great power. But can he get back, or is he being lead into a destiny that he is desperate to avoid?<p>

Chapter 1: We are all Equals in Death

It was very dark. Not cold, it was the wrong time of year for cold. But it wasn't supposed to be dark yet either. Musing over this unusual change of surroundings, Josh trudged along the road towards his house.

Everything was going downhill. He was mere weeks from taking his GCSEs (and had trouble concentrating on revision), he'd only recently got a girlfriend, and was already having trouble hanging on to her, and he was freaking out over his current amount of homework, which didn't even include the revision he was supposed to be doing. Shifting his bag onto his other shoulder, he sighed and continued trudging up the hill to his house.

Even so, he was on-route to a perfect life. Guaranteed, he was having trouble with his girlfriend, but they were already making up (and making out). His grades would make most people envious, even if he thought they were sub-par, and he wasn't anywhere near the amount of trouble over work that he had been before. Yep, like was good, he mused, and he wouldn't want it any other way.

What he didn't realise was that fate had another plan for him, and it did not involve a cushy pension and secure job. Fate was, at this very moment, barrelling towards him in the form of an alicorn with a mane like the northern lights, and a two-tonne lorry laden with explosives.  
>Fate is a cruel mistress, and a worse wife, and that is why it had chosen this unusual and relaxed human to be its instrument.<p>

Josh, of course, knew nothing of this, and began walking faster towards home with every intention of living life to the full.

The sound of the lorry was unique in Josh's otherwise linear life. It involved the crushing of cars, screams, and perhaps most importantly, a sudden blast from its horn, which almost managed to root Josh to the spot...

Almost...

Sprinting towards the upcoming bend, he suddenly realised that his life depended on being able to outrun a lorry, and though the idea SOUNDED cool, it was almost impossible, but for the fact that the lorry was still too far away to be guaranteed to crush him, and he nearly slowed down. He would have sworn he heard beating wings, but he was probably imagining things.

Risking a glance behind him, he realised that the lorry was travelling at a speed which defied physics, and probably the law in most major countries, though he had more worrying things to think about. Mainly that the lorry was about to crush him, but also that he was hallucinating. After all, a draconequis: a) Couldn't drive a lorry, b) Didn't exist, and c) Probably wouldn't be aiming for a single person in an entire city, let alone him. But mainly that they didn't exist. They were, after all, a figment of Lauren Faust's imagination. It was ironic that he was thinking at speeds which shouldn't have been possible, but should have been running faster.

He ran faster.

Even so, he reckoned that he was going to die at the hands of an insane HGV driver, even if he was hallucinating that creatures out of a TV show for young children were driving it.  
>He realised that he was about to run into a pony, one that looked like Celestia. Unlikely, but it's best not to take chances when it comes to these things. Moving to duck under the outstretched wing, Celestia stepped forward, and moved to shield him.<p>

Time slowed down.

In the lorry, Discord, spirit of, well, Discord, hit the side of the driving wheel in frustration. He might not have been able to save (from his point of view) the instrument of fate that both he and Celestia wanted so badly, but he could kill a few humans. There was nothing wrong with that, after all, it wasn't like most of them did any good.

Celestia looked around at the human. He was breathing heavily, and seemed to have a Cutie Mark, but she felt satisfied that this was the right species, and the right individual. Looking at the, now stationary, lorry, she spoke to the creature.

"A great responsibility has been placed on your shoulders, child. You must now make a decision. Come with me, and save many, or stay here, and let even more perish."

Pausing for breath, Josh nodded, hoping Celestia would understand.

"I only wish," his treacherous thoughts brought up, "That I was wearing something cooler than my school uniform."

With a flash, he and Celestia disappeared.

Almost simultaneously, Discord disappeared. A moment later, the bomb in the back of the lorry exploded. The news would state that the act was committed by terrorists with backing from a hostile state, but only three people knew the truth.

To most of the world, two had never existed.

To those who knew him, the third was dead.

Oooh, suspense! Well, not much. Normally these things show someone in a bad situation, or who wish to come to Equestria, ect, and the intro explains this, but it's my first fanfic, so I'm drawing some of the outlines on my own, so to speak. What I've probably done wrong is miss out the explanation of how the main character knows about MLP FIM, but it's not affecting the story at all.  
>Like I said, it's my first fanfic, so constructive criticism, not pointless ramblings. Probably won't update too much either, but hey, I AM doing my GCSEs, so sue me if I take too long (not really, I'm already skint).<p> 


	2. Apples and Omnivores

Chapter 2: Apples and Omnivores

"Are you SURE Applejack?"

"Sure as hay I'm sure. I know when somepony's been stealin' mah apples, and somepony's been stealin' mah apples. No two ways about it!"

Applejack had been acting like this for nearly two days now. She'd gone into the Orchard to start applebucking when she'd just as suddenly come back out again, claiming that somepony'd been stealing apples.

It was nonsense of course. They'd laid traps, camped out, and even resorted to scrying, but there wasn't any trace of a pony having been in Sweet Apple Acres that ponies didn't know about. A rasher pony might have suggested that it was one of the farmhands, but Rainbow Dash knew first hoof what happened if you suggested that, and nopony had tried it since.

"I don't know if I can keep coming here day after day AJ, I still have an EXTREMELY important assignment to do from Princess Celestia, and it needs a LOT of attention."  
>"If you help me catch the culprit, I'll give ya all the help you want."<p>

Sighing, Twilight resigned herself to a day spent scrying for ponies in Sweet Apple Acres, something that she was not looking forward to.

In truth, Twilight was certain that the two objectives; her assignment and AJ's thief, were linked.

In fact, she was certain, seeing of how explicit Celestia had been about the nature of the assignment.

FLASHBACK

It had been the day before the Apple Bandit had turned up. Twilight was reading the most recent addition to the library - a compulsory check to ensure that there was no material inside that could be potentially dangerous - when she had received a message from Princess Celestia. It was almost certainly urgent - the message had come straight to her, rather than through Spike, and on the front, in red ink, was stamped URGENT. Opening the letter, Twilight was shocked to find that it was not only written in a scrawl, but that it was in somepony else's hoofwriting - it had never occurred to Twilight before that Celestia used a scribe.

The message, unlike usual, was fairly to the point, and had crossing-outs all over it. It read (eventually):  
>Twilight,<br>I need you to undertake an incredibly important assignment immediately - a matter of national security. I was forced to bring a human into our world to ensure the safety of both our races, however in the teleportation I not only lost contact with him, but ended up in Coltchester rather than Canterlot, my original destination. I must ask you to attempt to find the human, and bring him to Canterlot. We have three weeks.  
>Celestia.<p>

Twilight had read the letter, re-read it (to make sure she'd read it right), then written out a neatened copy, and burnt the original. She'd begun to prepare for a long journey, but before she could really get started, she'd be told by Applejack to get over to Sweet Apple Acres. She did not expect the delay that she was now facing.

END OF FLASHBACK

Standing under one tree, with a bowl of water with ink in it in front of her (make do and mend, her mother always said) Twilight sighed, and peered in, asking for a glimpse of the intruder in Sweet Apple Acres.

The water looked different. The bowl didn't seem to have changed, but Twilight realised that she wasn't looking at her reflection anymore. The picture was of some ten feet above her head, looking down, past a monkey-like shape, down onto her head, and the bowl.

Wait... Monkeys don't live near Ponyville...

Whirling round, Twilight launched a stunning spell up into the tree, and was rewarded with an apple core being chucked at her head, with impressive accuracy. Rubbing the side of her head, Twilight noticed that the figure was standing on two legs, had no wings, and was relying heavily on its forelegs for grip, holding onto a branch near its middle for stability.

"Twilight's found em'!"

Applejack and Rainbow Dash practically teleported next to Twilight, Spike on Rainbow's back, clinging on and looking distinctly green. It was an impressive contrast.

"Now you listen here ya' no-good thief! If you don't wanna' feel the flat end of mah hoof, you'll get down here right now!" Applejack yelled. She appeared to be considering whether this new creature was indeed a threat or just a pony, in which case she was more than happy to deal with it.

The creature shook its head, and pulled an apple off a nearby branch, biting into it loudly. It was an outright declaration of war, and the creature seemed to be actively mocking the farmpony.

As Applejack moved up to the tree, the shadowy figure bit down on the apple, holding it in its mouth, then gripping a branch with its, now free, foreleg. As Applejack gave the tree an almighty buck, the creature wobbled, but with the extra stability that its forelegs gave it, it didn't fall.

"Y'know AJ... I'm not sure that's a pony."  
>"Don't be a foal Rainbow Dash, what else could it be, a human?"<br>"Oh come on AJ, like humans..."

The pair broke off, as the universally accepted sarcasm contained in a slow clap broke out over them. It seemed to come from the outline in the tree.

"You? You're the human Celestia brought here?"

At the mere mention of Celestia, the human retreated further up the tree, took the apple out of its mouth, and began eating it again, safely lodged in a fork in the trees branches.

"No, wait, I don't want to hurt you! Uh... How does Fluttershy do this... Um... Me. Twilight. Me. Friend. Me..."  
>"Oh shut up. Do you have any idea how demeaning that is?"<p>

It was all Rainbow Dash could do not to laugh at the look on Twilight's face.

"You can talk!"  
>"Naturally."<br>"But you climbed further up into the tree when I mentioned Celestia, and you only shook your head when Applejack asked you to come down!"  
>"It's rude to talk with your mouth full."<br>"But you're a human! Humans don't know about that sort of thing! They can't even write!"

The malice that came from the last statement seemed to make the air colder.

"I don't think it liked that Twi."  
>"But it's true!"<br>"Yeah, but it's smart enough to talk and not to fall for your dumb animal voice, so why should it listen to you if you accuse it of being stupid?"  
>"Uh, hello?" The human let go of a branch to wave with a foreleg.<br>"One, I'm still here, and two, I'm a he. HE. Not an it, or she, a he."  
>"So yer' a stallion?"<br>"Bzzzt! Negative points to the farm filly. Do you call a male chicken a stallion? Is a baby cat a filly? No. I am a boy, or a man, depending on whether you think I'm mature or not."

The angry lecture had stunned the ponies into silence. It took them a while to get their voices back, by which time the human had finished its apple, and was sitting on the lower branch of the tree. Twilight spoke up first.

"So... Do you have a name?"  
>"A name..." The human stopped, seriously considering his answer. "Well, for a pony-ish name, I like the sound of Glyphic, but I'm better with tech than magic, so I suppose I'd be something like Blueprint or Ratchet, but if you want my actual name, it's Josh." He launched himself off the branch. He was dressed, to the trio's amazement, in clothes similar to those of a suit. They were plain (Rarity would have gone into shock at the sight of plain white and plain black), and his shirt (at least, it was similar to a ponies shirt, so it was probably a shirt) was tattered around the cuffs, and stained, so probably hadn't been washed for a while. He had hair on the lower half of his face, and on top, but not many other places. His trousers (again, just a guess), were tattered around the bottom, but not so badly that they looked destroyed. He had a bag on his back, with straps going over his forelegs, and was only standing on his hind legs. His hind... hooves? were encompassed in some kind of protective cover, and his eyes were yellow. What hair he had was black.<p>

'Josh' held out one foreleg.

"Pleased to meet you, Elements."

Now this, this is suspense. What will the trio do? Is the human going to be accepted by the rest of Ponyville?  
>Ah screw it, you'll find out later.<p> 


	3. The Usual Unplesantries

Chapter 3: The Usual Unpleasantries.

"So, let me get this straight..."  
>"Humans can't use magic, rely solely on their intelligence to stay above their natural predators on the food chain, often eating them or using their bodies for some other purpose in the process, and are so divided among themselves that there has only been total peace in the world for... oh, around 5 minutes at any one time. I think."<p>

Twilight and Josh were talking, one taking notes, the other slowly leafing through a book in an attempt to find the answer to a question that had not yet been answered. The pair were still uneasy around each-other, but they had reached a beneficial understanding: Josh wanted to remain as incognito as possible, while Twilight wanted to know everything that Josh could remember about human culture. So far, they had managed to last a day without any major incidents.

"Your race is weird as hay Josh."  
>"Says the creature who developed cups that they couldn't actually hold."<br>"At least we don't have fights over the smallest of things."  
>"Touche."<p>

That wasn't to say, however, that they hadn't argued.

"I do have one thing to ask you."  
>"Oh? What's that?"<br>"First, please appreciate that, like I said, I'm an omnivore."  
>"I don't like where this is going..."<br>"Understandable. Can you get me a fish? Salmon or bass are OK, I think."  
>"..." Twilight had a blank look on her face, which somehow managed to look more revolted than confused. "You're disgusting. And where am I going to get fish?"<br>"Fluttershy, maybe?" Josh shrugged. "Perhaps she has some for the carnivores that need her help."  
>"I don't think Fluttershy DOES carnivores. Nor does she know you're here."<br>"I..."

The sentence was lost to the sudden and violent knocking of the door. Josh shoved his book back into the shelf, Twilight wincing at the thought of her precious book crumpling, and quickly but quietly made his way up into Twilight's bedroom. Twilight opened the door as soon as the upstairs one closed.

"Princess Celestia!"  
>"My dearest Twilight, it is a pleasure to see you again."<br>"I'm honoured Princess... But why are you here? I would have thought that you would been out searching for the human!"  
>"I am Twilight. But I wondered if I could come here before I started my search proper. You do have a spare room I hope?"<br>"Of course Princess!" Josh was using the room rather than sleeping on the couch, which would had left him even more obvious. He'd left his bag in there. "I'll move in there immediately."  
>"Oh no Twilight, I couldn't do that! You do live here, so there is no reason for you not to stay in your room. I'll go and put my stuff in there immediately, then I'll sort out some last minute supplies, and I'll leave in the morning."<br>"No, you shouldn't go in there Princess, it's very important! There's ... Uh..." Twilight racked her brains for a decent reason. "The bed's far too hard! You'd hurt yourself!"  
>"I assure you Twilight, a hard bed is fine. I often slept on rocks when I first started to reclaim Equestria from Discord."<br>"Well, I ought to show you around. You might need the toilet, or a snack, or..."  
>"Twilight! I assure you I will be fine. If you have a stallion round then I am more than happy to place my bags and leave."<br>"Oh no Princess! I'll, uh... Oh, just follow me."

Sighing internally, Twilight moved up the stairs into another round room, which had four doors coming off it.

"The guest room is this bedroom here..." Twilight said, sounding slightly tired, and pushed open the door.  
>"My Twilight, you HAVE had a stallion round, haven't you?"<br>"No, I, uh..."  
>"Uh, hey Princess C." The voice came from outside the window, more specifically Rainbow Dash. "It's, uh, great to see you."<p>

Princess Celestia stared out the window for some time.

"Oh. OH. So you really didn't have a stallion round."  
>"What, I..." Twilight and Rainbow stammered at the same time.<br>"Well, I respect your life decisions, and I'm sure your parents do as well. I'll leave you two to your... Game."

Princess Celestia walked out onto the branch, and leapt off. Rainbow grabbed hold of the branch and clug on tightly. Once Celestia was out of sight, she got up. "She's gone."

Josh pulled himself up off the branch, coughing violently. "Y'know Rainbow Dash... *cough* For an athlete... You're bloody heavy."

Twilight sighed in relief as Josh pulled himself through the window, and Rainbow dropped his bag on the floor.

"I guess..." Twilight began.  
>"I'll head down into the basement. I'm sure that I can sort some kind of nest out... Are you OK Twilight?"<br>"I'm..." Twilight visibly sighed. "Yes, I'm fine now. Thank you Rainbow. I'll be fine now."

The trio walked downstairs, Twilight wondering why she'd felt so worried for the human now setting up home in her basement, when only minutes ago she'd have been glad to see the back of him.

I couldn't have been magic, after all.

So what why was she so happy to see him?


	4. Strange Friends, Stranger Enemies

Chapter 4: Strange Friends, Stranger Enemies

"We CAN do this, right?"  
>"Right!"<p>

Twilight and Spike stood on the edge of Fluttershy's garden, with a list in Spikes hand. Most of the things on the list were crossed out, except for about five, on various places on the list.

"So, the last five things are..."  
>"Number one!" Read out Spike. "Get fish from Fluttershy. Number two! Get clothes from Rarity! Number three! Get shoes from... someone. Failing that, get a book on making shoes via L-Space. Number four! Get hold of medicine safe for Josh. Number five! Get Pinky Pie to swear not to hold a party for Josh until otherwise told so. And not to talk about him in front of anyone other than the elements and me."<br>"Oh, hello Twilight. I didn't..."  
>"AAAHHHHHH!"<br>"Eep!"  
>"Woaumph!"<p>

Twilight calmed down enough to register that it was only Fluttershy, complete with injured little bird and surprised look. She was trying to hide behind her own mane. Spike pulled his head out of the ground in time to catch the tail end of Angels laughter.

"Oh, Fluttershy, I'm sorry, we weren't paying attention."  
>"Oh, no, that's OK. I was wondering, who's Josh?"<p>

Twilight looked around suddenly, startled. "How..."  
>"Oh, not that long, but you were talking quite loudly, and I wondered why. So, what was it you wanted? I hope it's not Owlowiscious again, he was so poorly when I saw him last..."<br>"No Fluttershy, it's not that. Actually..." Twilight glanced round, this time furtively. "No-pony else is here at the moment, right?"  
>"No, I mean, yes, no, wait what I mean is, uh, there aren't any ponies in my house or around here right now but me and you, I think."<br>Twilight nodded. "OK, can we go inside then, this isn't something that I want anypony to find out by accident, and it could be problematic."  
>Fluttershy's eyes widened, then she nodded. She tried to pull her mane around her face, but only managed to cover one of her eyes.<p>

It made her look quite cute, actually.

Once inside, she drew the curtains, locked the door, and dimmed the lights.  
>"Angel, can you go and make us some tea?"<br>Angel saluted and hopped into the kitchen. Spike nearly tripped over a prone hawk, and apologised. "Did you really need to do all this Fluttershy? It's kinda hard to WOAH!"

He'd tripped over a puppy.

"Fluttershy checked the puppy for bruises, then shrugged. "It seemed appropriate. I mean, that's what happens in the books right? So this is OK, isn't it, I mean, if you want then I can open the windows and ..."

Twilight stopped her by carefully putting one hoof over her mouth. "No Fluttershy, this is fine." She paused, then remembered to take her hoof off of Fluttershy's mouth. "Since when did you read that kind of book?"  
>"Oh, I love them; all the animals get them for my birthday." The animals nodded, looking around at each other.<br>Twilight frowned. "But. Creatures. Money." Shaking her head violently she focused, looking Fluttershy in the eyes. "Never mind. What I am about to tell you is TOP SECRET. Only a handful of ponies know about this, the princess excluded."  
>"Oh, have you started going out with Rainbow? Everypony in town thinks you make a brilliant couple."<br>"What? NO! Fluttershy, please, focus!" Fluttershy recoiled at the outburst. "I'm not a fillyfooler, nor is Rainbow! I think. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, top secret. Only the ponies who I mention are to be told about this. And I'd ask all of you not to mention this to anypony." Twilight turned to the animals for the last statement, who all made various motions, all amounting to "I promise," nothing exempt. "Now then, what do you know about humans?"

* * *

><p>"So much for that." Josh sighed, having finally finished putting the books he'd been using back in their appropriate places. Anything that had been observing, Owlowiscious included, would have noticed a common theme to the books. Josh had been using Owlowiscious had been acting as Josh's scribe, something that he had done rather well at, even though it was only 4 in the afternoon."I have no way to get back that is already known, bar getting one of the princesses or Discord to send me back, and I have no idea if I'd even end up on the right world, let alone in my home town. Without the intervention..." "Who?" "I N T E R V E N T I O N. Of one of the princesses or another entity, I'm stuck here. End scroll." Owlowiscious obligingly cut the end of the parchment, leaving a rather large piece with writing on hanging off of one end. He rolled it up, and held it out for Josh to take. Josh sighed and took the parchment, tying it and putting it next to the other scrolls, making sure he remembered that it was the one with purple ribbon on it. He sat down with a thump. "Life's a bugger sometimes. I really hope that those books are just outdated." He sighed again, and got up to get a drink.<p>

Rat-a-tat-a-tap tap tap!

"Who knocks like... Crud!"  
>"Twilight! It's Rarity, can I come in? I need to pick up a book!"<p>

Looking round, Josh ran into the kitchen as silently as possible, pulling the door shut as Rarity opened the library door.

"Oh, hello Owlowiscious! Doing a delivery for Twilight?"  
>"Who!"<br>"That's good of you. Who's it for?"  
>"Who. Twitwho!"<br>"You little..." Josh muttered under his breath, getting the hidden hidden message behind the owls message.  
>"In Canterlot! Are you just taking it to the post office, or are you going there yourself?"<br>"Who, twooho." Josh looked around the kitchen. There had to be some apple juice in the fridge surely.  
>"I'll leave you to sort that out then. I'll just grab something and I'll be off. A black book on ancient regalia I think."<br>Josh saw a black book on the table. He couldn't read the cover, but he had a feeling that it was the book. "Oh please no, please tell me that's not the book." He looked around the room once more. The table was low, and he might fit under it. There wasn't a tablecloth on it... He'd have to improvise.

Rarity opened the door, Owlowiscious hovering anxiously behind her. "That's the book!"

Owlowiscious looked round the small room once. He whispered an anxious "Who?"

Rarity levitated the book off the table and looked over it. "Yes, this is the book! 'A Gyde to the Reygalya of our Fayr Country'" She paused, frowning, and levitated the book into the bag. "I wonder why they used so many y's..." She turned to Owlowiscious, smiling happily. "Thank you Owly! I'm sorry to have bothered... Oh, is that apple juice? Can I push you for a class before I leave?"

"Who, who." 'Owly' muttered. Josh grinned. It obviously wasn't a name he liked. The action caused him to lose just enough attention to lose his grip on the inside of the table legs, and he fell to the floor with a thump. Rarity turned round to see a strange creature on the floor. "God's... that hurt..." Josh muttered, and looked up, into the anxious eyes of the white unicorn, and saw Owlowiscious shaking his head in an ashamed manner. It was unnerving to see that his head went just over 90 degrees before going back.

"Are you OK? That was rather a loud thump, is anything broken?"  
>Josh experimentally stood up, cracking his back and rubbing his head as he did so. Rarity winced, then gasped.<br>"Omygosh! A human! You poor creature, I know Fluttershy will know what to do with you, you must come with me at once!"  
>"Thank you for the offer... Rarity is it? But Twilight is looking after me for now, so I think I'll be fine."<br>"Twilight is..." Rarity shook her head. "Oh Spike, it's you really isn't it. Stop being silly."  
>"Oh no miss, I'm a human, through and through. It'd be a mercy if I'd been hit by a spell, I tell you."<br>"Oh my! Well what are you doing here?" Rarity gasped "You're here to enslave us aren't you! Well I'm not standing for it! I'll take you on myself!"  
>Josh shook his head, sitting down and pouring himself a glass of apple juice. "Nope. Wouldn't be staying with a powerful spell caster if I was planning to, nor would I start so close to the capital. No, I'm here because I got forced here, and I can't find my way back."<br>Rarity stopped waving her glass around like a bludgeon, and began to appraise the creature in front of her. His clothes were so _tacky_! Surely he wasn't happy dressed like that! "Perhaps I could be of assistance as a seamstress?" Josh laughed involuntarily, choking on his drink. Rarity gave him a thump to his back, realising that she'd made a terrible blunder, but the human waved her away.

"I think that me walking through town will cause an uproar, considering that we're in one of the busiest parts of Ponyville from what I've seen. Even if we aren't that far from your work."  
>"Well..." Rarity paused for a second, realising what they'd have to do. "I don't need to take you to the boutique! I can take the boutique to you! Wait here, I'll just go and get the essentials!"<br>In a blur, she rushed out the door into the street. Josh and Owlowiscious looked at each other. Josh drained his glass and sighed. "Oh dear, here I go." He snorted, remembering what Rarity had said. He glanced at the owl at his elbow, who looked at him with a glare that had swear words in it. "Who."  
>"Fine, but if we have to pay, you're explaining the practicalities of me giving her any money."<p>

* * *

><p>"...So yeah, that's why I came to you."Throughout the story, Twilights crowd, including Spike, who hadn't heard the story yet. Fluttershy frowned.<br>"Well, I'm sure your reasoning is sound Twilight, but not telling Princess Celestia about the human..."  
>"Josh"<br>"Yes, Josh, maybe isn't such a good idea considering she brought him here."  
>Twilight looked down at the floor, scraping her hoof.<br>"Yes, but there's one other thing. Josh told me that Celestia didn't act... well... benevolent during the little trip between worlds. In fact, she acted downright violent according to him."  
>"Violent? But that doesn't sound like Celestia?" Fluttershy said.<br>"That's what I thought." Nodded Twilight. "But then Josh told me that humanity was a violent race, and she might have thought that she was acting like a proper leader. All the same, he doesn't want to take that chance."

Fluttershy stared at her cup of tea for some time, deep in though. After what felt like hours, she finally spoke up.

"I respect you completely Twilight. I know that this can't be easy for you, so I don't want to make it harder, but I still don't know. Humans ARE omnivores, and I don't want any of my animals to die to feed him..."  
>"Oh yeah! Do you have fish?"<br>Fluttershy looked up, startled. "Fish? Of course. Live or dead? Fillet or whole? Boned or not?"  
>"Boned?" Twilight stared, but managed to catch up with what she was talking about. "Oh right! Josh said to get fish, but not how..."<br>"Well..." Fluttershy tapped the table, then looked up. "Seeing as how I know now... why don't I go and see him?"  
>Twilight nodded at this idea, and looked at Spike. "Spike, please cross off 'Get fish from Fluttershy' from our list." She turned to Fluttershy. "Let's go now! Everypony ready?"<br>"Oh, wait!" Fluttershy said.

She indicated the curtain to Angel, who began sorting out the animals to either get rest or open the curtains and windows. She finished seeing to the bird she'd brought in earlier, a simple cold pack on its head, then turned back to Twilight.  
>"Let's go!" She said, beaming, picked up a fish from a freezer in the back, then walked out the door. Twilight and Spike followed. One more pony on their side, one more pony who wouldn't tell Celestia.<p>

Twilight frowned. There it was again. That thought. Why did she care so much about Celestia not finding out? Yes, she'd been un-Celestia like, but that didn't mean that she was going to hurt the human...

Right?


	5. Fate is a Cruel Woman

How the Mighty can Fall Chapter 5:  
>Fate is a Cruel Woman<p>

I haven't updated in FOREVER! I think I owe an explanation, but there isn't one really.  
><strong>Yes there is.<strong>  
>Pinkie, get off my IPod. How are you even using it?<br>**Uh, hello? Forth wall demolition specialist! It's practically my job to do this sort of thing!**  
>It's not your job?<br>**It's a hobby. So then, that reason?**

**I didn't quite catch that, oh OMNIPOTENT ONE.**  
>zms.<br>**Say again?**  
>Had mock exams.<br>**There. That wasn't so hard now, was it?**  
>It's been months. The mocks were two weeks ago. It's an excuse. I don't do excuses, I do reasons.<br>**Meh. So when will I be in this?**  
>In this story? Maybe never. But it should be a series, so you'll get in eventually.<br>**I shall prove you WRONG!**  
>Quite! Now we have to do...<br>**TEH STOREH!**

"I still don't know how he'll take to seeing you, so it's probably worth me going in first, then you can come in once he's ready, OK?"  
>"That's fine Twilight, I'm not good with new ponies either, so I know where he's coming from. Sometimes I can be helpful too, you know."<p>

Twilight and Fluttershy were approaching the library, Fluttershy with her fish, Twilight with her list. She'd been to see Rarity - she'd hoped to get the dilema over with quickly, but it looked like that would have to wait. As she reached the door, Rwilight heard a voice chatting away. Flittershy widened her eyes.

"That's Rarity! She must be inside!"  
>"Great, let's go in!" Spike said excitedly, leaping off Twilight's back and bolting to the door.<br>"...But she couldn't have just gone wandering around like that, so I told the poor filly to come with me to Carousel Boutique with me. You should have seen her, mane like a cloud, and a tail to match."  
>"Ouch, talk about embarrassing."<br>"TELL me about it. So I tried her with different outfits, and eventually found the PERFECT saddle, gem-encrusted with a beautiful contrast to her coat. But of course, I mentioned friends and the poor dear ran off, probably scared out of her wits."  
>"Do that's how you met Twilight?"<br>"Naturally. I gave her the saddle later, but that morning was nothing compared to what happened while we were after Nightmare Moon herself."

Twilight stood gobsmacked as Rarity and her newest client stood in the centre of the room, taking measurements and constructing a kind of ponyquin, whilst chatting about their own knowledge of their town and the friends they had.  
>It probably didn't help that the client was Josh.<br>He noticed Twilight and Fluttershy standing in the doorway.

"You made it then?"

Rarity turned to face the newcomers, then went back to her work.

"Twilight, Fluttershy, darlings, could you please explain to Josh why green and purple are a fabulous combination, and would suit him perfectly."  
>"Rarity, I don't..."<br>"Oh that's easy. You see most ponies are restricted by their coat colour..."

Fluttershy went on for a good couple of minutes, before stopping as she realised that all eyes were on her. Lowering her head, she lost her flow.

"I mean, it's your work Rarity, so you really know best, and, um... I wouldn't... Want... To put you..."

Josh sighed and shook his head.

"Look Rarity, I appreciated that you want to do as much as you can for me, but can we start with casual wear, all the same. And PLEASE in dark colours, I don't go well with bright ones."

Huffing, Rarity grudging began to work to Josh's specification, but still went for light over dark colours.

"All the same, I don't see why it has to be green and purple. No offense Spike, but I don't particularly want to look like a large one of you."  
>"I can see where you're coming from, but all the same, it is a nice combination."<p>

Spike puffed up his chest with pride. On the ponyquinne, a short sleeved top and pair of trousers were forming, in purple with green embroidery.

"Just not the green, please Rarity, there's got to be a better colour."  
>"Maybe this will help?" Twilight held up an old book, tattered and faded.<br>"Equestria's Ancestry - a beginner's guide? Really Twilight?"  
>"It could have something that suits you - maybe you can find a fire related one?"<br>"Purple and red... Isn't that chaos fire?"  
>Twilight frowned. "What's chaos fire?"<br>Josh shrugged. "What it says on the tin - purple flames, said to destroy everything. At least, I think they are."  
>"Well, heraldry is always a good one." Fluttershy whispered. She paused, then lit up. "I know!"<p>

Fluttershy took the book from Twilight, then grabbed a book from the shelf.

"Myths and Legends of Equestria - Ponyland and Dream Valley collection!"  
>"Ponyland? That's Gen one, is..." Josh started, then hit himself one the head. "Never mind."<p>

Fluttershy opened the book. She stopped on a page with a picture of three children, with a symbol above them. It was red and purple, and turned from flames into a heart. Josh took the book, and began reading.

"The Saviour of Worlds. A human who is believed to have defeated the dark sorcerer Tirek with the Elements of Harmony in their purest form. 'From the grasp of chaos to harmony's hand, the kingdom shall be forged anew'?"

Twilight pulled out the Elements reference guide, and opened it to a page. The same symbol and phrase was etched in, albeit with a slight change to the wording. Josh put the pages together.

"'From the grasp of chaos...' What does it mean?"  
>"No-pony knows. It was thought to be the source of the elements, hence 'harmony's hand', but now no-pony knows for sure."<br>"So it's a prophecy. I hate prophecies, they never make sense until they're right on top of you, and sometimes not even then." Josh said glumly. "Still, I may as well... Yeah, Rarity, can you do a purple and red colour scheme? It's as good a place to start as any."  
>"Of course, it would be my pleasure." Rarity started unravelling the green threads, and replacing them with red. Spike walked over, pins in back, eyes popping out. Josh turned to Fluttershy, stuck again in model mode. "So why were you here again?"<p>

Fluttershy paused, then went bright eyed for a second. "Oh yes, now, do you want the fish filleted, boned, poached, steamed..."


	6. Cows, Cows Everywhere

How the Mighty can Fall Chapter 6  
>Cows, Cows Everywhere<p>

No Ayub, if you're reading this, this isn't it.

* * *

><p>Josh carefully placed the last part into his contraption, and check the pressure valves. It was a work of art, AND science. Einstein himself could not have made a more impressive device.<p>

Twilight looked at the collection of pipes, wires, poles and one magnet with suspicion.  
>"So, NOW will you tell me what it is?"<br>Josh took a step back, then picked up a candle, lit it, and placed it under one of the flasks in his contraption.  
>"I think so..."<br>The pair sat, silently, as water began to boil in the flask, turned into steam, and turned a turbine in the section above it. The steam ran through a one-way valve, through a pipe, through another flask with a slight cooling spell on it, turning into water, and back to the first flask. Josh nodded.  
>"It's a primitive generator."<br>As they watched, the turbine turned faster, and turned the magnet, which was inside a coil of wire, which linked to Josh's phone. It pinged.  
>"YES!"<br>Josh himself pumped the air, jumping up and scaring Twilight into a corner.  
>"For Celestia's sake, will you not do that!" She yelled, pulling herself out of her new hidey hole.<br>Pinkie Pie opened the door, vibrating slightly.  
>"Yyyyyooouu gguuuyyzz hhaavvee gggooottt ttooo ttrryyy ttthhhiiisss!"<p>

* * *

><p><strong>I told you so.<strong>  
>Shut up.<p>

* * *

><p>"Pinkie Pie, are you mad, close the door!" Twilight yelled. Josh turned round, and the candle fell over. He stamped it out, but the entire structure began to vibrate slowly around the table.<br>"I didn't do it."  
>Pinkie Pie looked at the human and rolled her eyes.<br>"Nnnoooo ssiiiilllyyy, iiiittt'sss aaannn eeaaarrrtttthhhqquuuaaakkkeee!"  
>Twilight frowned. "Ponyville doesn't get earthquakes..." Her eyes widened, and she dissappeared from the room.<br>"Twilight?" Josh looked around, trying to hold his contraption in place. He carefully positioned himself around it, and frowned. "Come to think of it, doesn't this happen before a..."  
>He didn't need to finish the sentence. From outside came the weather teams' call of...<br>"STAMPEDE!"

Josh rushed outside, looking for a better view of the charging cow herd. On the horizon he could just about see a moving mass of brown, heading straight towards the town. He gasped.  
>"Good God, it's huge!"<br>He was vaguely aware of a number of the townsfolk stopping and gaping at him, but he wasn't worried about that. He looked around for Rainbow Dash, and saw her above the top of the tree.  
>"Yo Rainbow! Get down here will ya?"<br>Rainbow Dash looked down towards the hollering human, and flew to his level. "What are you doing out here, are you insane? You'll be crushed!"  
>Josh shook his head. "That stampede looks like it'll flatten half the town. I have to help. And I have an idea. Where's Applejack, anyway?"<br>"Apploosa. Oh Celestia this had better be good."  
>Josh shrugged. "I don't know about good, but it's original. All you need to do is..."<p>

* * *

><p>"Thish ish brilliant!" Pinkie Pie sat on a rooftop near the edge of town, eating a bucket of popcorn. "Applejakschs epischode wasch nothing compared to thisch!"<p>

Josh looked down nervously. Rainbow held him in her forelegs, just above the leading cow. "Are you sure about this?"  
>"Hell no, but drop me already, I'm starting to panic!"<br>Rainbow sighed, and, with the aim of the practiced, dropped Josh squarely on the cow behinds back. He huffed, winded, and pulled himself up. He pulled himself up, and gulped. "Oh gods, what was I thinking..."  
>He stood up on the cows back, wobbling, and stepped quickly onto the next cows back, then onto the back of the cow in front, sitting down. Two large horns looked at him, and he grabbed onto them with dear life.<p>

"Is he going to do it?" Twilight asked, hooves over her eyes.  
>Pinkie Pie thust her foreleg into the bottom of her bucket, and frowned. "That was some good popcorn. I need to get more of that stuff sometime."<p>

Josh opened his eyes, and grabbed the top of the horns. He tried to use them as handlebars, but only succeeded in turning the cows head slightly.  
>"Damnit!"<br>He looked up. The town was getting dangerously close, so close that he could see Pinkie Pie on her roof. She waved.  
>"Plan B it is."<br>He carefully turned around on the cows back, and stood up, very slowly, using a horn as a support. He looked behind him, and Pinkie Pie shouted out from the town. "Thirty seconds!"  
>Josh thumped himself on his chest, and coughed loudly several times. His throat suddenly felt very dry.<br>"Twenty seconds!"  
>Bracing himself against the cows sides, he cupped his hands around his mouth, and shouted.<p>

* * *

><p>Legends say many things about what he spoke. In Canterlot, the story was that he used a word of power that froze all those who heard it. In Cloudsdale, it was said that he displayed a force of such agression that the cows halted in fear. In Ponyville, ponies say that he uttered the name of the Cow god of death, said to call the god himself.<br>In a way, they were all right.

* * *

><p>Pinkie Pie paused and cocked her ear to better hear Josh's plan B.<p>

"HORSERADISH SAUCE!"

* * *

><p>"Ugh..."<br>"Oh good, your brain works."

Josh winced as he moved to sit up. His everything hurt, and his nerves were screaming from the memory of extreme pain not long ago. He was in...  
>Nothing.<br>It was black Nothing, rather than blinding white Nothing, but that only made the figures around him stand out more. The one who had talked was a large beefy man, with tattoos all over, and he wore a tank-top and camo shorts. He looked rough, but at the same time he made Josh feel safe. The next was a tall woman, wearing a deep blue robe with a hood obscuring most of her face. Josh could just about see the outlines of a face behind the darkness, and he got the feeling that she was pretty, but inclined to being less friendly than the man. The third and final person, and they were all people, was a tall armoured woman, which gave off a glow. She was carrying a crossbow, and though he couldn't see her face - or for that matter, look at her at all - he knew she meant good, but was inclined to dealing with it one way. The trio stepped back from him.  
>"Josh, we three have called you here for a reason." Began the man.<br>Josh held up his hand, then began massaging his aching limbs. "If you can get me working again, I don't suppose you have any painkiller."  
>The man sighed, and Josh's limbs hurt a little less. Josh nodded for them to continue, but stayed sitting down.<br>"We three represent the cardinal forces in our world. The sun, the moon, and the ever-changing earth."  
>"Celestia, Luna and Discord?"<br>The figure Josh took to represent the Moon shook her head.  
>"They are physical representations of us. We are not the same, and have not been for many years."<br>"It was on our command that you were brought here. But it would be on a whim that they destroyed you." Sun put in.  
>Earth kneeled down, and looked Josh in the eye. "You have a great destiny in store for you. It will not be possible for you to avoid it, but we will try to help you."<br>Night spoke softly. "Of the three of us, I shall be able to contact you the easiest. Just remember that a Nightmare may come of many things."  
>Earth smacked Josh on the shoulder. "I wish we could tell you more, but there's only so long you can be comatose, so I'll wake you up now."<br>Josh nodded, before pausing.  
>"Wait, did you say..."<p>

* * *

><p>"...Comatose?"<br>Josh started awake in his bed in the Library, startling Fluttershy.  
>"OH GODS!" He screamed suddenly as his nerves caught up with him, alerting the ponies outside the door to his presence. He hunched over suddenly, gritting his teeth and clenching the sheets. Fluttershy rose up a bit higher to finish the bandages she was putting on.<br>"Move aside, I owe him this much!"  
>Josh vaguely registered a white body in the corner of his eye, and collapsed as the intense pain he was in stopped suddenly.<br>"Are you OK, young one?"  
>Josh moaned into his pillow, and shook his head slowly, trying to gather what remained of his wits.<br>"What did I do?" He groaned, slowly shifting around, only to be eased back by Fluttershy. Angel offered him a carrot and shrugged.  
>"You shouted out something, and the cows stopped suddenly, and you flew over the leaders head, got two huge gashes along your back, and hit your head on the ground. It was a very silly thing to do, you know."<br>Josh took the carrot and crunched down on it, chewing slowly and looking at the ponies around his bed. Twilight - saw it coming; Pinkie Pie - She was nigh omnipotent, of course she was; AJ - Maybe the apples were waiting; Rainbow - evidently she thought he was important enough to let the weather wait; Rarity - Probably in her element; Fluttershy - well who else could look after a human; Princesses Celestia and Luna - Maybe he counted as...  
>Wait... Celestia?<br>"What happened after my fall?" Josh said, slowly.  
>"Oh, everything blacked out, and then there was this cool shimmery effect, and these spirits were like 'Oh no!', and we were all like, 'OMG he's unconscious', and some ponies from town saw you and they were all 'Woah, Human, sweet, but oh no, he's hurt', and Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash went all über cool and like 'He's awesome, he saved us, quick help him', and the three spirits shimmered and went away and then later they came back and were all 'OK let's save him with our spirity cool magic' and then you woke up and were all like 'Ow!' and we all thought 'OMG now what?' and Celestia burst in all like 'Imma help him!' and then you were ok and now we're here." Said Pinkie. "But that's the abridged version."<br>The ponies stared. Josh finished his carrot, and looked for a bin to put the end in, but Angel took it.  
>"Is that about right?"<br>Twilight shook her head to clear her thoughts. "Just about. You were out for almost a day, we were petrified. Not sure about the spirits though."  
>Josh nodded. "Nothing personal guys, but could I get a nap? I have a feeling I'll need it later."<br>The ponies nodded, and began to file out of the room. Josh notice a pile of gifts by the door, rather large for such a small group. Celestia and Luna waited until last.  
>"Josh, I must warn you that you have a large number of admirers right now..." Luna said, looking at her sister.<br>Celestia bowed her head. "I owe you much Josh. I hope that I can make it up to you, apart for that one catch..."  
>Josh waved his hand. "I'll survive. I can manage Fluttershy's treatment a little longer." Angel prodded him hard in the ribs. "Ow, not while I'm recovering! But to start with, can you keep the weather schedule bad for a while? I have a feeling it would do me some good..."<p>

* * *

><p>Long chapter, far too long a wait. This was originally two, but one works better for me. Also, I will need three or four OCs of the pony kind to a certain spec. If you're willing to contribute, PM me, and I'll give you more details.<br>Also, I suck at action scenes.


	7. Recuperation and Rewards

How the Mighty can Fall (Might change the name BTW)  
>Chapter 7: R&amp;R<p>

Josh was given strict orders to rest and stay in a calm environment. He would have gladly taken the orders, had it not been for the new issues.  
>The clouds were cleared up before Celestia could issue the new weather forecast, so most ponies were inclined to go out. Since before he'd been unable to say or do anything of interest, Josh had been mostly left alone while he was resting, but now that he was able to move around somewhat and answer questions, many ponies took the opportunity to speak to the new hero.<br>The major issues came from the foals. The schools bullies were snobbish and somewhat thick, so at least Josh could make subtle insults about them and get laughs out of the more intelligent ponies.  
>The CMC were also somewhat slow on the mental side, but they were kind. At first they wanted to know about Josh, but he managed to keep stories about him to a minimum, and focused on the stories he salvaged through video games. 'Legend of Zelda' went down remarkably well despite some of the duller parts of it, but Josh enjoyed making stories out of what he already knew about games. He usually got Owlowiscious to write them down. They usually tried to get Josh to come with them to earn Cutie marks after he'd told them that he didn't, being human, get one, but though he'd been interested in some of them, he was promptly stopped by Twilight. He'd be annoyed to admit it to the crusaders, but she was right.<br>Pipsqueak was cute, but fell under the category of 'excitable child', and Josh slowed down a lot while talking to him, avoiding most of the things about violence. He still had a small level of honour left, after all.  
>Fluttershy was a common visitor, she was, after all, his doctor, and she made sure to keep his bandages clean, wound disinfected, and pain levels low. It was the only thing he asked of her, but he was determined to pay her back.<br>The rest of the elements were common enough as well. Applejack stopped by once a day to check up on him, usually in the evening, and he tried to find out about some parts of farming he hadn't known about. She confessed during their second such session that she actually quite liked oranges, and had a tree of them growing in a corner of the field. Mac was apparently in charge of non-tree crops, and Applebloom helped Granny Smith with most of the bushes and vines. There was also a small army of helpers that were available when needed.  
>Pinkie Pie kept asking him about "Those cool secret cameras" to which Josh finally swore her to an oath of secrecy, and told her about his universal theory. She seemed satisfied, and dropped it, but she occasionally made zipping motions when he was going to mention a sensitive topic, so she wasn't a complete nuisance.<br>Rainbow Dash asked him mostly about how humans got around. He'd gotten her to Pinkie Pie swear before going right through the humans transport history. She was upset about the treatment of horses, but he managed to avoid some of the worse parts and got to cars relatively quickly. THAT got her interested.  
>"A metal box that has four wheels, and can go faster than a pony because of some gizmo inside it? I don't believe it."<br>Josh sighed. He'd been reading the Highway Code for ponies (it was pretty similar to the bikers code). "The 'gizmo' is a thing called an 'Internal Combustion Engine'. They're hard to make - get it wrong and it will become a combusted engine, but if you have enough combustion chambers you can generate enough power to go at ridiculous speeds. Make a car light enough and you can break the sound barrier without taking off. The current aim is 1000 miles per hour over a 1 mile acceleration period."*  
>Rainbow Dash looked smug until the little fact at the end popped up, and she zoomed out to find Applejack. Josh sighed, and got back to the legal document.<br>Luckily, Rarity didn't visit often - she was too busy, and usually only came to drop off another set of clothes or chat over the issues of wearing clothes all the time. She mentioned styling and beauty products briefly, at which Josh mentioned he could do with a certain brand of shampoo, and Rarity had happily obliged.  
>Quite a few ponies from town had come in. Most of the first ones were what Josh referred to as 'Money grabbing slimeballs'. They usually didn't get very far.<br>The second group was what Josh called 'Well Done Wishers'. Ponies who had small businesses that were endangered by the stampede. They usually brought gifts, and though he took some of them, he tried to refuse as many of them as he could. It wasn't as many as he'd hoped, but when it came to money, he was practically clueless. He'd counted it up at the end of one of the visitor sessions.  
>"1 bit, 24 shillings, and 18 pence."<br>"That's wrong." Twilight said, putting away the results of Josh's latest experiment. To be fair, Josh had only had a partial hand in it. Rainbow Dash was the pony who'd said she knew where to get the things to try 'An awesome experiment'. She was currently sitting on the floor in a sooty daze.  
>Josh picked up a destroyed combustion chamber, and inspected the insides. "What did I do wrong? Aside from the huge hole this has actually survived incredibly well."<br>Twilight tugged the chamber out of his hands and peered inside. "Wow, it has, hasn't it? A shilling on is worth 12 pence and there are 10 shillings to a bit."  
>Josh paused. "That's not much, is it?"<br>Twilight shook her head. "Well, you have been refusing anything larger than a bit, and it is the foals who give you money."  
>Josh shrugged. "Just making sure I'm not suddenly rich."<br>And that was the end of the internal combustion engine and money issues. As far, that is, as Twilight and Josh were concerned.  
>Unfortunately for Josh, his major issue came when he got better...<p>

* * *

><p>*True, promise! Look up 'Bloodhound'<br>Woo! Fluff chapter!


	8. Meet Pinkie Python

How the Mighty can Fall  
>Chapter 8: Meet Pinkie Python<p>

Josh pulled the myths book out again. It had been nagging him for a while, but the prophecy was too difficult to figure out. Twilight had mentioned that Celestia was visiting – maybe she could help, she owed him that much.  
>He was about to go into the room where the pair were talking when he heard Twilight shouting.<br>"We CAN'T, he's a hero!"  
>"Well take him down a notch. It shouldn't be too hard for you."<br>Josh stuck his ear to the door, and frowned. Yep, definitely Celestia and Twilight. Celestia had a tone to his voice that he didn't like and certainly hadn't heard before. Spike nudged him slightly and pressed his ear against the door as well.  
>"Josh isn't stupid, he'll figure out what we're doing. We can't outright assassinate him."<br>"Then make life in Ponyville problematic for him."  
>"I can't get the town to listen to me completely. Applejack, Pinkie, Rainbow, Mac, Fluttershy... They'll all go against him being evil or corrupted mentally."<br>There was a long pause and the sound of a large pony walking around the room. Josh looked down at Spike. "Happen often?" He mouthed.  
>Spike nodded. "Trixie." He mouthed back.<br>Josh frowned. A set up by Celestia? But that made no sense!  
>"How about using a werewolf or vampire?" Celestia said.<br>"That... I tried that with Trixie, but she got managed to avoid getting caught. "  
>"She was more adept at magic than she gave away. I didn't blame you. Josh, on the other hand, is a human, and magic escapes him. Get him bitten, then drag him into the light and watch him burn."<br>"I'll try. And if it comes to it, I'll stab him with a steak myself."  
>Spike gasped suddenly.<br>"Did you hear something?" Celestia asked.  
>Seizing the initiative, Josh knocked on the door. "Twi? You in there?"<br>Celestia opened the door.  
>"Oh, Celestia! I don't suppose you can spare a minute can you?"<br>"Unfortunately I can't, but feel free to send me a message with Spike any time."  
>"Ehem." Spike coughed.<br>"Oh sorry Spike, I didn't see you."  
>"Also, I have those things you asked for." Spike said, holding up a bunch of scrolls.<br>"Oh, thank you Spike. And with that, I had best be off. I'll see you some other time Josh."  
>Celestia walked outside and flew off. Josh turned to Twilight.<br>"Aren't you going to be late meeting AJ?"  
>"AGH! I'M GONNA BE TARDY AGAIN!" Twilight yelled, and zoomed out of the door.<br>Spike scratched his head. "So you're going to want to know what's going, aren't you?"  
>"Well, if I'm gonna get bitten and killed, then I want to know as much as I can."<br>Spike sighed and sat down, then pulled out a scroll from his basket. He handed it to Josh, who unrolled it.  
>"It's a transcript of all the discussions they've had regarding what Celestia's called 'Disposal of Issues'."<br>Josh took the scroll, and looked through the various discussions.

* * *

><p>T: She's in town now.<br>C: Perhaps you should cause a reason for her to leave.  
>T: She's incredibly unpopular, she's managed that herself. I'll raise a... Can you hear something?<br>C: That's an Ursa Minor! Deal with it, then deal with Trixie. Force her into its path.

* * *

><p>"This is Trixie right?" Josh asked Spike.<br>Spike nodded. "Keep reading."

* * *

><p>T: She's run off into the Everfree.<br>C: I'll get an agent on it. Luna has begun to look for the vampires and Werewolves to cure them, the Zebra will have to be kept secret from her.  
>T: Consider it done.<p>

* * *

><p>"She failed at that then." Josh snorted.<br>Spike laughed humourlessly. "Celestia wasn't pleased about that. Skip forward a while."

* * *

><p>T: She came for Nightmare Night while Zecora was in town!<br>C: What!  
>T: Didn't you think to contact me?<br>C: She said she would be staying in!  
>T: You need to be more careful about her, she might figure out what you're doing.<br>C: Yes, thank you Twilight, I figured that out myself. I might need you to deal with her.  
>T: I can't kill a princess!<br>C: The elements, on the other hand...  
>T: You'll need to set her up.<br>C: I'll deal with that another time. For now

* * *

><p>"Josh, Spike, have you two seen my scarf?" Twilight suddenly yelled.<br>Josh scrambled to hide the scroll while Spike feverishly began searching for it.  
>"Is it in the basement?" Josh called out, stuffing the scroll into Spikes basket.<br>There was quiet for a minute.  
>"OK, thanks Josh!" Twilight yelled, pulling the door shut behind her.<br>Spike let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.  
>"She's done that before. I've never been that quick on my feet before, usually Owlowiscious has had to hide the scroll."<br>Josh paused and grinned. "Where is Owly now anyway?"  
>"Sleeping." Spike said. "Speaking of being tardy, shouldn't you be at Sugarcube Corner helping Pinkie?"<br>Josh paused. "Crud!" He ran outside as fast as he could, slamming the door behind him.  
>Spike sighed and pulled out a fresh scroll and quill.<br>"D.E.A.R... P.R.I.N.C.E.S.S... L.U.N.A..."

* * *

><p>Josh slammed the door to Sugarcube Corner shut and vaulted over the counter.<br>"Sorryi'." He gasped.  
>"That's OK. I do it all the time. You ready to bake?"<br>"I can try!" Grinned Josh, breathing heavily and walking over to the sink. He paused before picking up his part of the order.  
>"Pinkie, has there ever been an Inquisition?"<br>Pinkie paused, frowning. "I honestly wasn't expecting that topic. I mean, the Inquisition."  
>"That's because..." Josh began<br>"NOPONY EXPECTS THE EQUESTRIAN INQUISITION!" They yelled, catching Gummy off guard and making him fall into his Punch bowl.

* * *

><p>John Cleese looked up from his book. A chilled wind went through the room.<br>"That's odd, I thought I'd fixed that."

* * *

><p>Josh grinned. "Seriously though, was there?"<br>Pinkie leant on the surface top. "I don't know about an Inquisition, but there used to be another name for Celestia's Apprentice."  
>Josh leaned forward. "Another name? What?"<br>Pinkie Pie looked around, and put her hoof over a point in the air.  
>"The High Assassin."<br>Josh raised an eyebrow. Pinkie Pie nodded furiously. Josh frowned.  
>"Not just any assassin," Pinkie continued, "They used to be able to use anything they wanted or needed to complete a task, and were forgiven of any crime but attacking the Princess herself. If you believe the stories, the Sparkle clan are all assassins of a varying degree."<br>Josh whistled and leant back. "Well then, I'd best not annoy Twi, huh?"  
>"Yep! That's why I have so many parties!" Pinkie burst out. "Why'd you want to know?"<br>"I just read something." Josh said, frowning. He hoped that the stories were just stories...

* * *

><p>Lots of breaks. More fluff, before I get to what should be a very interesting part.<p> 


	9. So Saw it Coming

How the Mighty can Fall  
>Chapter 9: So Saw it Coming<p>

Josh checked his list. It was completely random to anyone else, but it made total sense to Josh. He hadn't put a title, in case Twilight saw it. It consisted of about 10 things. Sun, Garlic, Decapitation, Dismemberment, Steak + Hammer, Disintegration, Silver to Heart, Crushed. They wouldn't make much sense of it, and that's what he wanted. He checked it against his second list. Pianos/Anvils/Ships, Swords/Daggers/Maces, Cooking (Mention allergies to Fluttershy and Pinkie if it comes up), Magic. The last thing was underlined several times.  
>"Josh, can you do something for me?" Twilight asked, popping her head through the door.<br>"Sure, what do you need?"  
>"Can you head into the forest to see Zecora and grab something for me? I'd get it myself only I'm a bit busy."<br>"I can do that. Is there a path?"  
>"Sure, just follow the well beaten road. Oh, but watch out for the Poison Joke. That stuff is NOT funny the day after."<br>Josh gave her a thumbs up. "I'll grab my bag and be off. What am I after?"  
>"Just something to deal with a problem. Tell her I sent you, and that'll be fine."<br>Josh nodded, pulled on his bag, and walked outside.

* * *

><p>It was a beautiful day. Josh looked up to see a thin cloud covering the sun. From another cloud he saw the telltale rainbow tail that was Rainbow Dash on watch for a storm. It was early afternoon – luckily he wouldn't have the CMC causing issues – but that did mean he might go off the trail and get himself in trouble. And there wasn't anyone else likely to find him. Nonetheless, he was respected, and ponies thought he was some kind of incredible superhuman warrior. He had to try, and more likely than not he wouldn't see a single thing. "Stop shaking you moron." Josh muttered. He shook his head and headed to Sugarcube Corner.<p>

* * *

><p>"Josh! Aren't you researching ghosts and demons and spirits and poltergeists and things?" Pinkie said, bouncing when she saw the human.<br>"Just vampires and werewolves." Josh said, grinning. "Can I buy a brownie for nerves?"  
>"Nerves?" Pinkie said, getting into a thinker pose. "I have the PERFECT solution!" She grinned, picking up a cupcake from the display.<br>Josh stared at it warily. "What is it?"  
>Pinkie kept grinning. "Super Salty Steeling Surprise. Guaranteed to bring any pony to complete any dare."<br>Josh sighed and shook his head. "I'll pass Pinkie. Just a brownie will do."  
>"Where are you going that you need that brownie?" Pinkie asked, picking the brownie from the tray and rolling it into a bag.<br>"The Everfree."  
>"The Everfree?"<br>"The Everfree." Josh confirmed, nodding.  
>"The Everfree..." Pinkie sighed, shaking her head.<br>"Is there an echo in here?" Josh asked, looking around.  
>"Eh, sorry. You want a milkshake with that for luck?" Pinkie rubbed her head.<br>Josh nodded. "Sure, but only if you're paying."

* * *

><p>Josh stepped up to the border of the Everfree, sipping on his Pinkie Pie Perfect Present Milkshake. It was very sweet, but started with strawberries somewhere. He thought.<br>The place was extremely grim and gloomy. It was a sunny day both inside and outside of the Everfree, but that didn't stop the place from feeling like a terrible thing was about to happen, Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here, Don't Enter the Deep Dark Woods...  
>He was probably imagining it.<p>

Inside it was actually a rather pleasant place. The flowers were mostly normal and completely safe, and the animals seemed to trust him. Perhaps that was Fluttershy rubbing off on him. He steered clear of the poison joke, humming to keep his spirits up. "She's an evil enchantress and she does evil dances and if you look in her eyes... Hah! Evil my arse."  
>Zecora's house was practically lifeless when Josh got there. It wasn't a good omen.<br>He remembered one of the things the Princess and Twilight had discussed. "Luna's begun to look for the vampires and werewolves to cure them..." Josh muttered, "The zebra will have to be kept secret from her..." He looked carefully around, picking up a large stick off the ground. "Crud"  
>He heard a crash and crack behind him and spun round, ready to take the head of the thing charging at him. Trixie stared him in the face.<br>"The human!" Trixie yelled.  
>"If you're gonna bite, I'll make you regret it!" He growled, holding the stick like a baseball bat.<br>Trixie looked around. "I might not have to. It's Zecora's time of the month..."  
>Josh turned around in a tight circle. "What, no 'Great and Powerful Trixie?'"<br>Trixie snorted, dangerously close to Josh's neck. "I don't need my stage name all the time... And when I said might..."  
>Josh whirled around, smashing Trixie in the head and stunning her for a second before he could get bitten. Trixie snarled at the discovery, and sprung forward, fangs bared. Josh ducked under the vampires grip and smacked her chest, forcing her onto her head. Something in the forest roared, and Josh ducked, sending the large shape flying into Trixie. Its fur was striped, but it was undeniably feral.<br>"Tit for tat, Stripes." Josh said, grinning and spinning his newest weapon around his wrist. "You hurt my leg, I hurt yours."  
>Zecora growled and pulled herself off of Trixie, and helped her up. The two supernaturals circled around Josh so they were on opposite sides. Josh moved so he had his back against the dead tree, and watched his enemies move carefully. Trixie disappeared from his vision, and Zecora moved so she was facing him.<br>"Crud." Josh muttered again, realising he was beat.  
>Zecora sprung forward as Josh dived to the side, but she clawed his leg and he tripped.<br>"Crap!" He yelled, pulling himself up and turning to face the zebra. Or at least, where she had been.  
>Practically simultaneously, he felt two fangs pierce his neck, and a set enter deep into his leg where he had been clawed.<br>Josh fell over, and smacked his head against a stone, falling unconscious as he heard the pair start to argue. He vaguely registered being dragged into Zecora's cottage, but compared to the pain he was in, it was minimal.  
>"Well this sucks..." He managed to think, before completely blacking out.<p>

* * *

><p>"...Shouldn't be possible!" Trixie roared.<br>"Well pardon me, my magical friend, but I did not want my life to end!" Zecora shouted back.  
>Josh groaned, but the movement was either ignored or unnoticed by the pair arguing in the background.<br>"He's still alive Zecora, and now we'll have to get a silver dagger before he wakes up!" Trixie yelled. Uh huh, he had been unnoticed.  
>"Well if you keep it down he might wake up later, rather than hearing you scream like a hater." Zecora finished calmly, looking at the bed where Josh had begun to stir.<br>"U mad Zecora?" He groaned. Josh rubbed his head with one paw, and rolled onto his back.  
>Wait, paw?<br>Josh felt something snap, and suddenly seethed. He might have been less angry if he hadn't felt two extra limbs on his back, which were incredibly natural, and yet felt completely wrong.  
>"WHY DID YOU TWO TURN ME INTO A WEREPYRE?" He roared, leaping out of the bed and pointing one of his new claws at the pair.<br>"Well..." Trixie began, looking at Zecora for support and slowly backing away, "It's something of a long story..."

* * *

><p>Trollolololololololol, Falalalala.<br>Werepyre: Noun – a creature of myth that originates from the MMORPG Adventure Quest, a Werepyre is a creature that is created when a vampire and a werewolf bite the same person within a certain time constraint, around 1 minute, which causes the two kinds of magic to intermingle and form a completely different creature.  
>And that's all you're getting from me!<p> 


	10. All That Sparkles

How the Mighty can Fall  
>Chapter 10: All that Sparkles...<p>

"I am Trixie, also known as the Great and Powerful Trixie. Until about a year ago I was a traveling performer, however I somehow managed to offend the Princess. She enacted her punishment when I got to Ponyville, you see that is where-"  
>"Yada yada yada, skip forward 'till you run away from the town into the Everfree. I know the rest" Josh butted in, sitting down on his haunches. It felt perfectly natural, and some part of him made him fix his eyes on Zecora for a few seconds. He shook his head and looked back at Trixie.<br>"Uh... OK then. So I ran into the Everfree. I'd just been shown up by the Princesses Prodige, and lost most of my possesions. I was sitting down in a clearing when I heard Zecora. She was arguing."  
>Josh looked at Zecora.<br>"The local vampire in charge of the clan. I must confess, I was not a fan.", the zebra conceeded.  
>"They were arguing over me. Not in a relationship way, over how to kill me. I scrambled to get up, and all of a sudden I was pinned on the floor, Zecora was shouting, and I passed out."<br>"I had to kill my vampire friend - he cause me fear for my own end. I brought in the mare and put her to bed, but if the princess had found out she'd have had my head." Zecora put in helpfully. Josh glared daggers at her, and she stepped back. Josh looked back at Trixie.  
>"I woke up a vampire, and Zecora explained the situation to me - she was a werewolf, I was supposed to be dead by order of the Princess, and the pony who beat me was indeed Twilight Sparkle, not some street pony. Magic is my talent as well, but I did not have her raw power - a bit like the difference between theory and practical at school."<br>"Except Twi is good at both." Josh pointed out.  
>"True, but when she came to ask Zecora about me, I was able to feign being dead some way from the clearing. I don't think she knows about me, but I still have to be careful."<br>"Oh trust me, she knows." Josh snorted. "So why did you attack me?"  
>"Celestia does upon the clans rely - to openly oppose them would cause us to die. But to force their hand would Celestia enrage, without the leaders us having to engage. If we bit you, you might survive, and lo and behold, you are still alive!" Zecora answered happily.<br>"I'm a Werepyre. How is that a good thing?" Josh asked sarcastically. "Oh great, I'm a walking behemoth of muscle and magic, now I just need to get home." He got up and began pacing on all floors. "I was hoping I could... Wait, Celestia?" Josh stared at the pair, suddenly shrinking slightly.  
>There was a knock at the door.<br>Josh dived out of the back window, scrabbling out and sprinting as soon as he hit the floor. Trixie dived under the bed.  
>"Zecora, we have a problem!" Twilight called from outside.<br>"I come my friend, the world shall not end!" Zecora called. She opened the door, only to get pushed back by Twilight.  
>"Have you seen a human?"<br>"Josh, from town? Not recently, don't feel down."  
>Twilight groaned and lent forward. She put her head in her hooves.<br>"He's in so much trouble, I need to find him."  
>"Twilight, what is it?" Zecora asked. She led Twilight in, keeping her facing away from the bed. Trixie bolted just before Twilight shut the door on her.<br>"I'd normally follow Celestia's instructions to the letter, but I sent him into the Everfree along the path rather than towards the grove, so no monsters saw him. He's still alive, but somewhere lost in the Everfree, and since Pinkie saw him just before he left she's freaking out, and so is the rest of town. Celestia came up with a 'monster' in the Everfree to keep ponies from going in, but now she's getting my mum to kill Josh and he won't stand a chance." Twilight said, wiping a tear away. "I need to find him and stop mum."  
>"He may have to the castle gone, an unusual place - it's certainly one." Zecora put in, handing a cup of tea to Twilight.<br>Twilight pushed it back shaking her head, and stood up. "Thanks but no Zecora. I'm going to head there now, wish me luck." She rushed out, leaving Zecora standing alone.  
>"Oh Josh, poor soul, I hope that I was not a mole." She wispered, tapping Twilight's tea with her hoof.<p>

* * *

><p>"Sorry!"<br>Josh just avoided the swipe of a manticores claw as he dashed past, desperate to get to the most secluded place in the forest he could. He didn't have any food, and he looked up to try and judge the time. He realised that he was completely unable to figure it out, and sighed, focusing back on the path. He wasn't tired or hungry, which worried him, but gift horse and all that.

His wings were unweildy until he learnt how to use them - he'd need an instructor to figure out...  
>No, he wasn't getting help any time soon.<br>He could see the edge of the woods. It was quite light outside, so Josh could see the mound quite clearly. As he got closer, he could see a series of picturesque streams, bridges and animal houses outside the main one. He grinned and skidded to a stop. Perfect.

* * *

><p><em>"For the love of Celestia if that's you again Redchest I'm going to give you a proper injury!"<em> Angel yelled, storming over to the door. Whoever was knocking was putting a lot of force into it, and probably needed help. Angel sighed and readied an apology. He jumped up, undid the latch and pulled back the door, to reveal-  
><em>"Whatever you do PLEASE do not get Fluttershy."<em>  
>In the door stood a huge wolf, easily the size of a pony, with a jaw that looked like it could go through bricks, let alone a rabbit.<br>_"We-"_ Angel began to yell, but was stopped by a paw over his mouth.  
><em>"Seriously Angel, no-one can know!"<em> the wolf said. He had a look in his eyes that made Angel think. It was more scared than angry, but a bit cocky, and looked slightly familiar. Almost like..  
><em>"Mph?"<em>  
>Josh moved his paw and knelt down until he was the same level as Angel.<em> "Hey buddy."<em>  
><em>"Woah, that's a problem. You're lucky Fluttershy is out, or you'd be on the wrong end of a stare right now."<em>  
>Josh sighed and drooped slightly.<em> "Can I come in?"<em>  
>Angel stepped back and Josh walked in, to be greeted by a storm of squaks, crows, squeals and hisses. A group of puppies ran up to him, and sat down in front of him.<br>_"Grandfather!"_  
><em>"I'm not a proper wolf, little ones, go back to your parents."<em>  
>One of the puppies tilted its head. <em>"That's OK, you're one of our great-great-grandfathers then!"<em>  
>Josh sighed and nudged the puppies back towards their parents. The older dogs nodded respectfully. Josh noticed that they hadn't spoken up once among the shouts and insults that the other animals had given him, not even to call back their puppies.<br>_"All right, you lot shut up!"_ yelled Angel over the crowd _"This is the human Twilight mentioned. Show the guy some respect, he wasn't one of these a few days ago!"_  
>The crowd quietened down so that there was only the occasional murmur. Josh looked at Angel.<br>_"So whatdya want?"_  
>Josh sighed and slumped down, his head hitting the floor hard. He sighed.<br>_"I'm a wanted outlaw."_  
>The crowd gasped. Angel shook his head. "Wait wait, how?"<br>Josh looked around, then closed his eyes. _"I got bitten, and I'm not even a bog-standard curable werewolf or vampire. I'm a freak. And Celestia suddenly says that there's a monster in the Everfree and no-pony can go in. If they see me then... Well, you guess."_  
>Angel hopped in front of him.<em> "Hey, it's not that bad."<em>  
><em>"Angel, do me a favour."<em> Josh said, eyes closed.  
>Angel hopped over, and bounced onto Josh's head. The puppies yelped and began to try to climb onto Josh as well, their parents holding them back.<br>_"Sure, what do you need?"_  
><em>"Try and keep the ponies out of the Everfree for a while, or show some of them the truth. I couldn't stand being alone at the- at the moment."<em> Josh's voice caught in his throat for a second, and he felt himself beginning to cry. He lifted a paw and wiped it away, making Angel fall suddenly. The rabbit got in his feet again and saluted._ "You have my word."_  
>Josh sighed and smiled. Maybe he could just...<br>_"Angel, I'm back! I have to help look for Josh and Twilight, I can't just sit here and pray!"_  
>Fluttershy walked in to a semi-concious winged wolf laying on the floor with Angel by his head. The wolf pricked up its ears, turned around, saw Fluttershy and sprinted out the door, barging past the small pegasus.<br>_"Well I never!"_  
>Fluttershy huffed and stomped the ground lightly.<br>_"Some ponies have no manners! Who was that horrible werewolf, I might have to teach him some manners the next time I see him!"_  
>Angel sighed and facepalmed. This could be a problem.<p>

* * *

><p>Run run run run, run the race of your life.<br>The song came to Josh as he ran, wind biting into him. It wasn't one he'd heard before, but it worked.  
>Hope that you can leave behind, all your angst and strife.<br>Josh began to cry again. Nobody, not even Fluttershy. He had some dogs support, but that meant little in reality.  
>Feel the pain a-rising, rising off your back.<br>Water splashed in his face. Josh wasn't entirely sure where he was anymore, but it wasn't near town. He couldn't even come up with a good song  
>Hope that you can beat the mind attack.<br>"Well well, a pegasi werewolf, how interesting."  
>Josh stopped and looked around.<br>"Only I have the real right to go through here, me and the rest of my clan that is. I only consider Celestia's requests because of who she is, after all."  
>"I don't want to fight."<br>"That's a pity. I do."  
>A large werewolf stepped forward, and suddenly out of the shadows of the Everfree came a pack of werewolves, all transformed, all sizeable.<br>If Josh had been standing properly, he would have dwarfed even their leader, who stood haughtily in front of him, looking down through his nose. As such, he was crouched to flee at the first chance he got, and was about the same height as one of the shorter ones.  
>"Your choice. Fight me and pass, fight me and die, don't fight me and don't pass, or don't fight me and get killed because you try to cheat."<br>Josh looked around, checking his opponent and potential chasers.  
>"How do I win?"<br>"It's quite simple. Pin me for five seconds before I can do the same to you. You can have as many trys as you want, but I'll aim to kill after about five."  
>Josh gulped, but nodded. "Alright then." He stood up on his hind legs, and braced himself for a fight, hunching over and baring his teeth.<br>If he was the same size as them when stood on all fours, now he was easily taller than them, and the sudden display of flexibility on his part made them stop and think. Their leader gulped suddenly, but crouched and got ready to attack.

"Three." One of the wolves counted.  
>"Two." Josh licked his lips.<br>"One." The werewolf tensed and put his weight into his haunches.  
>"Fight!"<p>

Josh sprinted foreward with one arm out, intent on stopping the smaller wolf from getting a firm grip. The smaller wolf lept under his arm and used his weight to force Josh onto the ground, but before it could bite him it was pulled off and thrown into a tree in one smooth motion. Josh rolled over and ran over to the wolf, but before he could grab it it rolled over and ran forwards out of his way. He managed to grab the fleeing wolves tail and yanked backwards, putting one hand onto its back and applying all the force he could, which was his weight and more.  
>The wolf collapsed, and Josh silently counted to seven in his head slowly. On seven, he lifted his weight off the wolf and stepped back. He looked around.<br>The smaller wolf looked up at him with contempt.  
>"Another pack leader looking to cause me hell?"<br>Josh shook his head and looked around for a landmark. There was a castle spire in the direction he had been heading before, as good a place as any to stay.  
>"No, just a traveler."<br>He dropped down onto all fours and started walking towards the castle, the circle of wolves parting as he passed. The leader struggled up from the floor.  
>"You idiots, he's getting away!"<br>One of the other wolves glared at him.  
>"You would do well to treat an obvious superior with respect, especially with a victory like that. Old fool." The wolf spat out the last two words.<br>She looked towards the spire which Josh was heading to. "We should be ready to help him when he asks for us. I will be."  
>Without another look at her old leader, she walked away.<br>The leader growled, but when the others followed the females lead, he spat.  
>"Traitorous scum! Nopony shows me up! Nopony!"<br>Growling and muttering, he walked back towards his den, murder in his thoughts.

* * *

><p>"Well lookie here, a master infiltraitor! Never seen a guy like you before."<br>The vampire, like most of his kind, had fangs and very pale fur. Josh growled and kept walking as he had been.  
>"Aww, why so cold? C'mon man, I just wanna talk!"<br>"I've had a run in with a werewolf already today, do NOT make me add a vampire to my list of victories today."  
>"Eh, suit yourself." The vampire lept down from his perch and grinned at Josh, landing in front of him.<br>"But there's a fee to get through, y'know."  
>Josh snorted. "Yeah, I bet there is."<br>"I ain't kiddin'! I've gotta get so much for each person that comes through here, and you're trying to get through."  
>"Charge the next person double." Josh replied, moving forward and pushing the vampire out of his way.<br>The vampire stepped back in front of Josh and held out a hoof to stop him. "Can't. The fee is one pint of blood, and you are NOT getting through without paying."  
>Josh narrowed his eyes. "One pint."<br>The vampire shrugged. "Give or take."  
>Josh shook his head. He moved forward again, chuckling at what some people were willing to try.<br>The vampire moved to block him again. "No joke."  
>Josh growled. "The pint would be for you and you alone, you can't share blood between vampires. If you want to get a sample, go into town."<br>The vampire bared his teeth. "Maybe you aren't as dumb as I thought. If you want to keep your blood so badly, get ready to defend it."  
>Growling, Josh sprinted past the vampire...<br>Straight into its chest, sending it flying. Josh yelled as his head hit the vampire. It felt worse than when he'd had a cronic headache.  
>"Move you bloodsucking moron!"<br>"Not until I get my lunch!"  
>The vampire pulle itself off of the tree and began to flit around Josh to distract him. He was moving so fast it was hard to spot him. Bracing himself for the impact, Josh put all his strength into a huge leap, flapping his wings to get more force behind the leap. He barreled foreward, smashing into the vampire, who went flying head first into another tree.<br>"Oh Ce-" The vampire groaned. Josh ran before it could recover, folding his wings away as he went.  
>"How the hay did he do that?" The vampire groaned, pulling himself out of the small crater. "I'm the strongest guy around here, I swear!"<br>He shook his head. "Maybe the guy stands a chance against that unicorn after all. Still, good luck to him and all..."  
>The vampire looked around. Luckily, his defeat hadn't been noticed, so maybe-<br>"Oh man, that was just AWESOME!"  
>Well buck.<p>

* * *

><p>Run to the castle, find an intact room, take shelter, refocus, expose Celestia.<br>Josh sighed. Why did life have to be so hard?  
>The castle was derilict, and had vines everywhere. From his veiwpoint across a gully, Josh could make out shattered windows and fallen walls. Nevously, Josh lept, and with a few huge beats of his wings, made it across. He cut the bridge close to the planks just to be sure no-one could follow him.<br>Looking inside the first room, he recognised it instantly. The huge pedestle in the middle of the room was perfectly designed to hold the five elements, and the boulder in the middle of the pedastles had a slight green tinge. Josh ignored them, other than to look for a door in the base and around the rest of the room. The only one he saw led to a stairwell, so he walked up, trying to keep a track of everything.  
>It was incredible. Many of the tapestires and murals were of very good quality, and one room even had an intact bed in it. All of them had some kind of issue, unfortunately, and Josh hoped that there would be a room that was intact before he started messing with other ones. With a heavy heart, and a feeling of dread at the sheer amount of work he would have to do, Josh opened the last door. The door was intact, so far a good sign, but it led to another stairwell, which Josh grudgingly climbed. About halfway up, he thought he heard the door slam, but it was too far down to bother checking, so he kept going.<br>The last room was the one where Twilight fought Nightmare Moon, complete with armour shards and pedestle in the centre.  
>"Fitting that another of Celestia's enemies should be beaten by where Nightmare Moon fell."<br>Josh spun around to face the speaking pony. Unfortunately, he hadn't managed to figure out that particular motion, and fell flat one his face.  
>"And you're supposed to be a danger to me? This has got to be a joke."<br>The speaker was a white and pink unicorn, who was looking down at the were-creature with contempt.  
>"Who are you, and what do you want?" Josh asked, pushing himself up, not even bothering to find some semblance of dignity from his slip.<br>"Twilight Velvet. I am Twilight Sparkles mother, and one of Princess Celestia's closest advisors."  
>Josh rolled his eyes. "If this is about coming in quietly, she's come to the wrong person. I will speak to her when I feel like it."<br>"Coming in? Oh no, I have been given a very different job to that."  
>Josh frowned for a second, then slowly backpedaled, eyes widening as he realised what was going on. "You wouldn't."<br>"I do this all the time." The unicorn answered nochalently. "It's 'just another day at the office' for me." She formed a sword out of her magic, which hovered in front of her as she stepped towards the retreating werebeast. "But for you, well."  
>Josh closed his eyes as the sword came closer to his neck. Twilight's mother smiled a terrible smile.<br>"For you, this is going be the end of your career."

* * *

><p>...Is not Twilight.<br>As a side note, Twilight's mum, aka Twilight Velvet, will now be know as Velvet for the purposes if narration. Not the Velvet that is an awesome Tumblr (look for it), but another Velvet entirely. Blame the MLP wiki.  
>And if you want to know why it took me so long to update, it's because I have a crummy computer. And it was being fixed for way to long.<br>Also, AN EDIT! Any text in Italics is in Animal - i.e. ponies don't understand it. Except Fluttershy. Because it's freakin' Fluttershy.  
>Yes, that includes you Pinkie.<br>**Damn. **


	11. One Last Huzzah

How the Mighty can Fall  
>Chapter 11: One Last Huzzah<p>

Final chapter. Waa waa waa...

This was by far the hardest chapter to start writing.

* * *

><p>Josh bowed his head, ready for what he knew was about to happen. Velvet smirked.<p>

"You know, after that little trick the two traitors in the forest pulled, I thought you wouldn't be this easy to kill. But you're hardly a challenge." She laughed. "Ah well. I guess this is gonna be easier than I'd planned."  
>Josh stepped back and lowered his head. He felt his foot brush something metal, and-<p>

"YOU GO JOSH!"

Velvet had begun to charge a spell, which made Joshabi think of magic missile, and was a faint blue. "No, turquoise." He thought, chiding himself for the thought.

"I'd say it was more a kind of purple." A second voice said into his head, the same one as a few seconds ago.

"Who are you?" Josh thought, stepping back.

"Oh, so shallow minded. In the sky, does what is not there mean nothing?"

Josh paused, stopping in his hesitant retreat to think about the statement. He rolled his eyes. "'Hi Josh, it's Moon', would have sufficed."

"Oh quit whining." The entity chided. "Do you want help or not?"

"Trick question. Protect me from the missile, I'll deal with the rest."

"Consider it done."

Josh nodded, stepping a bit further back. He stopped to think for a minute. "How? And where are you anyway?"

"Just get ready to fight."

Josh looked up at Velvet once more. She opened her eyes and grinned at him again. "Any last words before you end?"

Josh nodded and grinned back. "What cannot kill me..." Velvet frowned, and Josh tensed, ready to spring forward. "Can only make me STRONGER!"  
>With a roar, Josh sprang forward, claws out to strike, and Velvet unleashed her magic missile, straight towards Josh.<p>

* * *

><p>"Angel, I can smell him here!"<p>

"Nice work Winnona. Is it the way we thought?"

"Yep."

"Alright. Tank, cover the sky."

"Mm hm."

The three animals were going through the Everfree as fast as they could, trying to get to Josh as fast as they could. Angel had been planning to go alone, but with the air support of Tank and Winnona's tracking skills, the search was going incredibly fast. They had already established where they were going, and all they had to do now was get there-

"Hurry, he's gone this way!"

Damn.  
>Angel looked down the path to see Fluttershy and her friends heading much faster in the same direction as they were. He was considering visiting the manticore for a boost of speed-<br>KRAK-OW!  
>The skyline was filled with a brilliant light, emanating from the very place that the groups were heading. A second later, there was the sound of an explosion. Angel and Twilight had twin looks of horror on their faces, and turned to their groups, panicking.<p>

"Hurry!"

* * *

><p>Velvet coughed, waving her hoof in front of her face. "What idiot throws themselves at someone with a ball of bucking energy above their head?"<p>

"One with protection."

Velvet gasped, but Josh pinned her to the ground by her neck before she could react. He began running one of his claws around the base of her horn.

"I've always wondered, can a unicorn feel through their horn, or is it little more than an ivory wand on your head?"

"It's a wand on my head." Velvet choked. Josh noticed and grinned.

"Aww, is the little pony having problems breathing?"

"Please... Stop... My daughter..."

"As far as I am concerned, Twilight is a lying hag who follows a tyrant. Give me a reason why I shouldn't crush your neck."

"Isn't this unnecessarily cruel?" Moon asked Josh, sounding slightly worried.

"I couldn't kill her; I'm having trouble keeping a grip on her at the sound of her choking. It helps for her to think I'm a sadistic bastard who enjoys this sort of thing." Josh replied. "Can you put her to sleep, I really need to go."

"Give me a minute."

"Celestia... Will kill... you..."

Josh looked at Velvet. She was looking at him out of the corner of her eye. Josh looked to the side slightly, considering the information.

"I thought you said you were kidding!" Moon said suddenly.

"She made a valid point." Josh responded, looking back at Velvet. He moved slightly so he could look at her eye better. "What happens when you cut off a unicorns horn?"

"Forbidden... True cruelty... Same with wings..." Velvet muttered.

"She's not lying." Moon added.

"What happened to that spell?" Josh asked.

"Casting in three..." Moon replied.

Josh grinned at Velvet. "Well, enjoy when you wake up."

The unicorn collapsed, smacking her head on the floor. Josh paused, looking at her.

"How do you do the safety position on a pony?"

"Just lay her on her side." Moon told him in a rush. "Now hurry, there's a pony flying up the stairs!"

Josh carefully placed the pony so she wasn't leaning on anything hard. He turned around to go, and saw the door smash open. Rainbow Dash saw him and glared.

"Listen you, I don't care who you are, but if you don't tell me where my friend is you're finished!"

Josh shrugged, moving towards the door. Rainbow flew into his face and pressed against it.

Josh looked at her. "If you aren't worried about me, why should you be worried about something as dangerous as a human..." He muttered, shoving her out the way. The Pegasus looked and saw Velvet where Josh had been standing before. She flew up to the ceiling on the other side of the room, and flew to barrel into him. Josh heard her, and just avoided getting two hooves in the back. Her turned and glared at Rainbow, who was sitting dazed on the floor a few feet away. She stood up and pointed at him.

"You hurt Twilight's mom!"

"Mum." Josh snapped. "And she hurt me first, she asked for it."

"This is a bad idea." Moon muttered. "Look at her neck."

Josh glanced at it, then snorted. "What, you need an artefact to beat anything now?" He turned and walked out of the door. "I don't need to discuss anything with you right now." He said over his shoulder, slamming it behind him. He heard a click, but ignored it, beginning to make his way out of the castle as quickly as his memory allowed.

* * *

><p>"Rainbow!"<p>

"Rainbow Dash!"

"Dashie!"

"Where ARE YOOO!"

The remaining elements of harmony walked through the castle, looking around cautiously. Twilight remained silent, focusing on a seeker spell for the Pegasus. Josh looked around the door carefully, trying to avoid being seen.

Very little escapes the ears of the scared and the observant.

"What was that?" Fluttershy meeped, reeling back from the door Josh had looked round. He cursed inwardly, looking for a place to hide. There was a group of loose stones in the roof which he might be able to use if he was careful...

"One camouflage coming up!" Moon informed him cheerfully. Josh nodded and flew up, using the gaps as handholds. He looked down and saw the elements, minus Fluttershy, looking down the corridor. He saw his body disappear as the spell activated.

"Are you sure you heard anything?" Twilight asked, scanning the room with a detection spell.

"Probably a loose stone, these old places are notorious for it." Rarity put in. Applejack looked at her. Rarity flicked her mane. "It's a profitable enterprise." The unicorn scoffed. Applejack rolled her eyes. Josh shifted his weight a bit to try and stop himself losing his hold.  
>One of the other stones was dislodged, and smashed down on the floor next to Applejack. In shock, the party looked up. Twilight, still with her spell on, looked up. The spell flashed up a creature near where the rocks had fallen, and the unicorn reacted on instinct.<p>

"MONSTER!"

Josh dropped down, abandoning all pretences, and hit the ground, Moon dropping the camo spell. He growled, and began moving towards the door, which Rarity was blocking. Moon began putting up as many shield spells as she could. Applejack saw the creatures movement and moved to stop it reaching Rarity. "Not happenin'"

Josh bared his teeth. "Can you roar?" Moon asked him.

"Sure, why?"

"Do it. Now."

Josh roared.

* * *

><p>Down on the lower levels, Angel looked at the looming set of stairs. "This is bad."<p>

"We have to help him. I'm not going back until I know he's safe." Winona told the rabbit, and began climbing the stairs.

Suddenly, they heard a roar. Angel felt a trickle of dust land on his head. He looked up, and just avoided getting crushed. "Move! Now!"

* * *

><p>"Impressive, but a bit of a waste of a monument." Josh thought to Moon as he barrelled through the crumbling relic.<p>

"I was improvising." She replied. "You're nearly out. First left."

Josh ran around the corner. "What about the ponies."

"They'll survive. Spiral stairs ahead."

"Backseat escaper." Josh retorted. "What about AJ and Rarity?"

"They have good friends." Moon assured him. "Run as fast as you can for the door."

Josh lowered his head and smashed the last door between escape. He stopped in the foyer, one of the few parts without a roof, and saw Fluttershy glaring at him. "Oh crud."

"You! That was horrible!" Josh stepped back, as Fluttershy moved closer to him. "You could have killed us! And you locked Rainbow in that room! How could you?"

"She attacked me!" Josh whined.

* * *

><p><em>You call that whining? This is whining!<em>  
><strong>No! Rarity! Stop it!<strong>  
>What is that... Rarity! Pinkie! Get out of my room!<br>**Run away!**

* * *

><p>"That could be understandable, but what about us!" Fluttershy said. She'd managed to pin Joshabi against a wall, and had her head pressed against him. "What were you doing then?"<p>

"It was instinct!"

"Instinct! So barging into my house and smashing back out afterwards was instinct as well!"

"I didn't barge in!" Josh complained.

"Oh really? Then why were you in there? Were you planning to EAT SOMEPONY?" Fluttershy yelled. Josh began cowering. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't hurt YOU to find out where my human friend is!" Josh mumbled under his breath, trying to avoid Fluttershy's eye. "SPEAK UP!"

"I AM JOSH!" The wolf roared. Fluttershy went back a bit. She stared at Josh, but at least she wasn't Staring at him.

"What?"

"I... I need to go." Josh muttered.

"Oh no you aren't you're-"

"Fluttershy! Look out!"

Josh looked up to see Twilight and Velvet readying Magic Missiles. He grabbed Fluttershy and pulled her to his chest, curling into a ball. Fluttershy and Rarity both yelled as the missiles flew at the balled up werepyre, and Josh felt the energy smash into him, sending him flying into the wall and out the other side. He looked up, slowly uncurling. He slowly stood up, Fluttershy standing like a shield in front of him. "Don't you dare hurt him! You've scared him now!"

"Fluttershy, it's a werewolf! It just grabbed you!" Twilight yelled, moving forward. Fluttershy stepped back a bit further. Josh looked behind him, where Rainbow had decided to pick up a large stone to chuck at him. He looked at his wings and coat. Moon's shield hadn't prepared him for it, and his wings seemed to be badly burnt. His coat was badly scorched.

"You can't say you were doing any better! He protected me! And he's not just a monster!" Fluttershy yelled back. Rainbow snorted.

"What is he, your coltfriend?"

Josh collapsed suddenly. "'M not 'er coltfrnd..." He muttered.

Fluttershy looked at him and gasped. "Oh no. Get up Josh, you're too strong to die now, come on!"

Rainbow blanched. "Josh? But he refused to tell me who he was!"

"Velvet..." Josh muttered. Fluttershy glared at the older unicorn.

"What do you have to do with this?"

"I've done nothing!" Velvet gasped. "He's trying to frame me!"

"Spylight sappin' mah story..." Josh chuckled, moving so he could stand with the support of a stone nearby.

"Stop framing me!" Velvet yelled. She could see his wounds healing- something that shouldn't have been possible for a werewolf. "We need to deal with him now!"

"I wasn't talking about you that time." Josh replied calmly, smoothing out his fur. Twilight and Rainbow blanched.

"Whaaa?" Josh looked at Twilight pointedly. Rainbow stared, mouth open. Rarity shook her head.

"You must be mistaken darling, Twilight would never-"

"I'm sure Twilight wouldn't point me towards the forest in the hope of me getting lost and killed by something." Josh said blandly. "However I will say that Velvet over there is an assassin and killer, and would have killed me had I not have help."

Velvet gritted her teeth. "You had HELP?"

Josh nodded and began walking to the edge of the ridge. He checked his wings for holes, but they had healed over incredibly well. "And with that, I bid you, adieu." He jumped off the cliff, and began to fly over it, making his was away from Ponyville. Twilight turned to Rainbow.

"Rainbow, we need to-" She stopped. Rainbow was staring at Velvet, a look of fury on her face.

"Help? You tried to kill him, and you're worried that he had HELP? I'M GOING TO REPORT YOU TO THE PRINCESS!"

"There's no point." Twilight told Rainbow, pulling her to the ground. "She's been orchestrating the whole thing, there's no way we'll get mum killed."

"Charming." Velvet snorted. Fluttershy glared at her. "Well, I have a report to make. I'll be sure to leave out the parts where you accused me of crimes, but I have to go after him later. Tara." The unicorn disappeared.

"_Josh!"_

"_Damnit, we missed him."_

The party turned at the sound of a barking dog, to see Winonna and Angel. A few seconds later they saw Tank fly around.

"_Angel!" _Fluttershy cried._ "You could have been hurt."_

"_We were fine Fluttershy, we had to help Josh."_

"_You knew?"_

"_Well, he did visit the cottage, but I didn't tell you that." _Winonna said. Angel glared at her. _"What?"_

"Fluttershy... What are you talking about?" Applejack asked.

"These three knew about Josh and didn't tell me." Fluttershy said. "That could have saved a lot of time."

"Can't be helped." Twilight said. "We'll just have to give up and go home now."

"Gi- Give up!" Rainbow yelled. "We aren't giving up!"

"And why not?" Rarity asked. "Josh's run off, we'd be opposing the princess – it'd be hopeless."

"We have Winnona, and we have the elements." Rainbow pointed out. "Now we just need to go home, pack our bags, then get back here. MINUS TANK." She finished, glaring at the tortoise.

"I..." Twilight looked down at the ground. "I don't think I should go... I mean, I'm just a liability, all I'll do is slow you down, and-"

"Not a chance." Rainbow said, grabbing her and pulling her back to their method of entry. "Now come on, we've got bags to pack, and we leave in the morning."

Applejack chuckled. "A proper Daring Doo adventure, huh Rainbow?"

Rainbow glared at her. "Hey, let's leave my fandom out of this. Now git."

* * *

><p>Worst. Chapter. Ever. This took me soo long to write.<p>

Epilogue coming up! Don't miss it!


	12. Epilogue

How the Mighty can Fall  
>Epilogue: Moving On<p>

"Smart move. You just lost what little support you had."

"It's called strategy."  
>Josh flew slowly over the treetops, heading north. He had been arguing with Moon for a while, but so far she was at least putting forward intelligent conversation.<p>

"You should have thought about where you were going first." Moon said, interrupting a chain of thought that was leading to the way that it should be possible to kill an alicorn.

"I did."

"Well then, where are we going?"

Josh looked up at a point over the horizon. It seemed to be getting taller. "There."

Moon formed herself a body quickly, using Josh as a seat. "Is that-"

"The ancient realm of the ponies, straight ahead." Josh replied, grinning. "Now you gonna hold on, or will you hitchhike in my body again?"

"Holding on." Moon confirmed. With a grin, Joshabi flew up, and began speeding towards a castle wrapped in cold.

"... My regards, Twilight Sparkle." Luna looked over the piece of paper at her sister. "What happened to unflinchingly loyal?"

"Oh shut up."

Luna and Celestia were in their combined rest area. They didn't really need to sleep, but nonetheless, it was nice to have a chance occasionally. Luna was sat on their bed, and was holding two letters. One had Twilight's seal on it. The other had Spike's. Luna glanced at the two pieces of paper again, re-reading them. She looked at her sister again. Celestia had been pacing for an hour, and showed no signs of stopping. Luna sighed. "And she really doesn't know about Spike?"

"Why would she, it's not like he's officially allowed to tell her." Celestia snapped. She walked over to the desk, picking up a third piece of paper. This one had a blank wax stamp on it, marking it as one of the more urgent letters she could receive. She skimmed it again. "The elements, on the other hand, should know nothing of my inner workings, and Velvet should count herself lucky that she is so useful to me. Stupid girl."

Luna rolled her eyes. "Oh give her a break, she's in her early 40s, that's not exactly young for a pony, is it."

"Not helping Luna." Celestia tossed the paper to Luna, walking to the window and staring out. Luna picked it up, and began reading it.  
>About a minute later, she stopped. She went over a couple of sentences again, frowning.<p>

"Tia, can you look at this for me?"

"What?" Celestia walked over, and read the part Luna pointed out to her. Several times.

"This was at the old capital castle, wasn't it?" Luna asked.  
>The two sisters stared at each other in shock. Luna quickly rolled up the papers and put them in a nearby bag. "I think we need to visit the armoury again..."<p>

"Everypony ready?"  
>The group made a series of noises, which Twilight took to mean yes.<br>"Excellent, then we're off!"

"_One thing."_ Angel asked, Fluttershy translating. _"If we don't find Josh, then what? Or we find him and he's in pieces?"_

Twilight looked at him, then into the Everfree. It loomed over the party of nine, making things much more sombre than they had been in their houses. "Let's just hope he's not..."

End of Book One


End file.
